Photo by Michael Carruth on Unsplash
“Cassandra was given the gift of prophecy from the gods, but she was also cursed: no one would believe her predictions. Even as the war she had warned against raged, no one took her seriously.”
~~ Elizabeth Lesser
Greetings to all my precious people!!
You are Cassandra.
You know what your family needs. You sense what your workplace needs. You can feel what the world needs.
But when you speak, your words fall flat.
Not because you’re wrong. You’re usually right. But because women’s voices – our knowing, our intuition, our prophecy – have been denigrated and dismissed for centuries.
This is the Cassandra Curse.
And if you’ve ever felt it, if you’ve ever known something deeply, spoken it clearly, and watched everyone ignore you, then you know exactly what I’m talking about.
The Myth of Cassandra
In Greek mythology, Cassandra was a Trojan princess. Apollo gave her the gift of prophecy: she could see the future with perfect clarity.
But when she rejected Apollo’s advances, he cursed her: No one would ever believe her predictions.
She warned Troy about the Trojan Horse. She saw the destruction coming. She spoke the truth.
No one listened.
And Troy burned.
Elizabeth Lesser, founder of Omega Institute and author of Cassandra Speaks, writes that this is the story of women throughout history:
We know. We see. We warn. We speak.
And we are not believed.
What I’ve Witnessed
In my 20 years working with women, I’ve watched this pattern play out thousands of times:
A woman tells her doctor she’s exhausted, something’s wrong, she can barely function. The doctor runs tests. Everything’s “normal.” He tells her she’s stressed, she should exercise more, maybe try antidepressants.
She leaves feeling gaslit. Her knowing dismissed.
A woman tells her partner she needs something to change in the relationship.
He says she’s being dramatic, too sensitive, overthinking it.
She doubts herself. Maybe she IS overreacting?
A woman warns her workplace about a problem she can see coming.
Her male colleagues nod politely, then proceed with the plan that will fail exactly the way she predicted. Later, no one remembers she warned them.
This is the Cassandra Curse in action.
Women know. Women speak. Women are not believed.
Why We Stop Speaking
After enough years of not being believed, something happens:
We stop trusting our own knowing.
We think:
- Maybe I’m wrong
- Maybe I’m too sensitive
- Maybe I’m overthinking
- Maybe I should just keep quiet
We silence ourselves before anyone else has to.
This is the real curse. Not that others don’t believe us. But that we stop believing ourselves.
We doubt our intuition. We dismiss our gut feelings. We override our body’s signals.
We become complicit in our own silencing.
The Seven Deadly Sins Keep Women Quiet
Elise Loehnen, in her brilliant book On Our Best Behavior, explains how the Seven Deadly Sins have been used to control women for centuries:
Pride = don’t be too confident, too ambitious, too visible
Greed = don’t ask for more (money, time, support)
Lust = don’t desire, don’t want, don’t take up space
Envy = don’t compare, don’t want what others have
Gluttony = don’t have appetites, don’t indulge, stay small
Wrath = don’t get angry, don’t set boundaries, be nice
Sloth = don’t rest, don’t stop producing, keep going
These “sins” are actually women’s voices, needs, and knowing—pathologized as bad.
When we internalize these rules, we silence ourselves.
We don’t speak up (pride).
We don’t ask for what we need (greed).
We don’t express our anger (wrath).
We don’t trust our desires (lust).
We become good. Quiet. Compliant. Unbelieved and unbelieving.
But What If We Spoke Anyway?
Here’s what Elizabeth Lesser discovered:
When women’s voices are equally esteemed—when we’re BELIEVED—the culture changes.
A different kind of hero emerges. One who values:
- Caretaking over conquering
- Compassion over violence
- Communication over vengeance
- Collaboration over domination
When women speak and are believed, the world becomes more whole.
But it starts with this: We must speak even when we know we won’t be believed.
We must trust our knowing even when everyone else dismisses it.
We must be Cassandra—and speak the prophecy anyway.
Speaking From the Body
In my work, I teach women to speak from a different place:
Not from the head (where we’ve been taught to justify, explain, prove)
But from the body (where we KNOW without needing external validation)
When you speak from your body—from gut knowing, from heart truth, from the wisdom your cycles have been teaching—your voice changes.
It’s not defensive. It’s not apologetic. It’s not trying to convince.
It’s simply TRUE.
And when you speak from that place—even if others don’t believe you—you believe yourself.
And that changes everything.
The Invitation
If you’re tired of not being believed – by others, but especially by yourself – I can help.
The 1:1 work I do is about reclaiming your voice. Learning to trust your knowing. Speaking from your body instead of your conditioning.
This is not therapy.
It’s not about processing your past (though that has its place).
This is not traditional coaching. It’s not about goal-setting and accountability.
This is midwifing. Helping you birth the voice that’s been trying to speak. The knowing that’s been dismissed. The Cassandra in you who sees clearly and speaks truth.
The C.O.A.C.H. Method (Curiosity, Optimism, Awareness, Courage, Hope+Healing) is designed for this.
We excavate the conditioning that keeps you silent. We rebuild trust in your body’s wisdom. We practice speaking from the gut/heart/womb instead of trying to prove yourself to skeptics.
Deep work. You leave speaking with authority—YOUR authority.
Workshop: Beyond the Fix-It Trap is also this work in community. Women witnessing women. Believing each other when the world doesn’t. Creating the culture we want to live in.
Are you ready to speak—even if you’re not believed? Are you ready to BELIEVE YOURSELF?
Let’s have a conversation for curiosity and begin to imagine the possibilities!
P.S. Cassandra was right. Troy did burn. She spoke the truth even though no one listened. And history remembered her—not as crazy, but as the prophet who was ignored. Your knowing matters. Speak it anyway.
“I am Cassandra – she who, without asking,
understood it all and still came to her fate.”
~~ Gabriela Mistral
